What Happens To Women In Their 50s?
Are you getting ready to turn 50? So many women are wondering what happens when they turn 50! We worry about our bodies getting older and our minds slowing down. Some of us worry about turning into our moms, or we worry about our adult kids having big, difficult problems.
Turning 50 is more than beauty advice and what not to wear, trust me! While anti-aging is important, it’s better to focus on the things that happen to all women when they hit the big 5-0!
Thinking About Changing Your Life At 50?
Growing older is more about attitude than appearance. Realizing that you are halfway through your life brings the most important things into sharp focus.
As a woman who is over 50 and a trained Marriage and Family Therapist, I wrote this article to help us focus on the wisdom and strength that we have acquired once we turn 50.
As we age, our bodies, relationships, and priorities change. Women face this reality with uncertainty and often feel left behind in a world that highly values youthfulness.
However, it’s never too late to embrace the realities of aging while focusing on self-growth. In this article, we’ll explore ways to help women accept the life realities of aging while remembering to focus on self-growth.
When A Woman Turns 50
#1 You are done taking bullshit.
Yes, we are. We are not kidding. When a woman turns 50, she is done taking bullshit. She is done with unhealthy relationships. After years of putting up with being controlled, manipulated, or dismissed, women over 50 are done with compromising to keep the peace!
Women have been culturally conditioned for centuries to be nurturing and people-pleasing. Something happens after a woman turns 50, she begins to see people for who they really are. She recognizes that waiting around and hoping for someone to change is hurting her.
Some Relationships Will Change After 50
She decides to take action. It might mean she leaves a toxic work environment, finally accepting that her boss is a narcissistic nightmare. Or she might decide to let go of a friend that uses her, realizing that her so-called friend is using her as an energy resource, leaving her to feel unbalanced and empty.
Sometimes when a woman turns 50, she decides to leave her marriage. After decades of hoping for change, she finally accepts that she deserves more than her husband is willing to give her.
Realizing that she is worthy of more love and support, she chooses to end her partnership, knowing that she tried her best. When her emotional despair and mental pain are greater than her fear of the future, women over the age of 50 are done putting up with bullshit.
#2 You commit to telling yourself the truth.
When a woman is over the age of 50, she begins to tell herself the truth. It might start with something small, like ” I never really liked wearing make-up” or ” I have hated wearing dresses since I was a child.” Starting with small truths creates a sense of safety that we can trust ourselves to know what is best for our life.
Just like we are done taking bullshit from others, we need to stop b.s.’ ing ourselves. Looking at the hard truths of our lives gives us the power to make necessary changes. Maybe we drink too much on the weekends? It’s possible that we use shopping to bring a temporary sense of relief from the bigger emotions that we are avoiding. Could our kids be right, do we have a problem trying to control other people?
Telling The Truth In A World Full Of Lies
Telling the truth is hard, that is why so many people choose to lie instead! But, as a woman over 50, you owe yourself the truth. If you need some help getting started, ask a trustworthy person to help you look at some of the re-occurring problems you have. Telling the truth moves us toward positive changes in every area of our life.
Finding a safe place, to tell the truth, might look like working with a qualified life coach or another mental health professional. You don’t want to get to the end of your life and wish you had been braver. Turning 50 is the perfect time to start telling your truth.
#3 You see the results of your parenting.
By the time you have reached 50, if you have children, you will be able to see the results of your parenting.
It’s important to remember that we all did our best as parents. We made decisions and took action in ways that we thought would help our kids. Sometimes we were right and other times, frankly, we could have done better.
Letting Go Of Grown Kids Is Hard
The reality is there is no perfect parent. Once we become adults, we are responsible for our behavior, even if we learned it as a child. So, if there are days that you feel frustrated about your adult child’s choices, remember, you did the best you knew how to do as a parent.
If there are some negative parenting moments and memories that you are struggling with, take some time to consider apologizing to your child. Relationships are always improved when we take ownership of our unhealthy behavior and apologize for it. A sincere apology has the power to heal a broken relationship.
#4 You realize that your marriage needs work.
Let’s face it, marriage is work. Hard work. And most of the time, it’s worth the effort that it requires. But when a woman reaches 50, she might realize that her marriage is on autopilot. It is very common for the needs of marriage to get pushed to the back burner when partners are raising kids.
Research indicates that most marriages have some adjustments to make after the kids leave home. Choosing to focus on your spouse and developing new shared interests are some basic actions you can take to freshen up your commitment.
How Does An Empty Nest Affect Marriage?
It’s normal to go through a period of disconnect and boredom when it’s just the two of you. Assuming you want to stay married to your spouse, make an effort to communicate about the disconnection you feel at this stage of life.
Neither of you are the same person that you were when you got married. Kids, careers, and life impact all married folks. Take some time to concentrate on rediscovering your spouse after the kids have gone.
#5 You care less about other people’s opinions.
There is something magical about getting older. You just don’t care anymore! Most women over the age of 50 finally find a powerful sense of self-acceptance. We quietly realize that other peoples’ opinions and ideas just don’t matter anymore.
We can identify the energy vampires in our life, and we begin to draw boundaries around our mental and physical energy. Women over the age of 50 decide to put themselves first, letting go of the guilt and shame that comes from others’ judgment.
Personal Growth And Change Are Important
Self-growth is vital regardless of age. For middle-aged women, it’s an opportunity to explore new passions, learn new skills, and embrace new experiences.
Self-growth helps us stay connected to ourselves, chase new opportunities, and develop new connections. It’s not too late to take a class, learn a new language, or travel to new places. By investing in self-growth, we can live life to the fullest while embracing our age.
#6 You focus more on energizing relationships.
After the age of 50, women begin to realize that some people require too much energy. It could be a constantly complaining co-worker, or maybe your sister wastes your time with irrelevant gossip. Something inside of you decides that you are done with feeling exhausted in your relationships.
As we age, relationships play a significant role in our lives. Middle-aged women need to focus on fostering healthy relationships, both with themselves and others.
Dealing With An Energy Vampire
It’s an opportunity to develop a deeper connection with ourselves, explore our emotions, and improve our communication skills. Healthy relationships also mean letting go of toxic relationships or friendships that don’t add value to our lives.
Spend some time focusing on how you feel when you are around certain people. Find people that feel comforting, energizing, and positive. Make those your people. Once you arrive in midlife, you are achingly clear on the fact that life goes by so quickly. Choose people that make you feel loved, seen and give you a spark of energy.
#7 You realize that your health is everything.
If you have ever had a health scare or have had to make a lengthy physical recovery, you already know that your health is everything! When a woman turns 50, she wants to keep her good health. Basic physical body movements, a reliable memory, and a lifestyle that prevents disease are all so important as we grow older.
Aging After Menopause
As we age, our bodies become more fragile and require additional care. Women need to focus on taking care of their physical health through regular exercise, a balanced diet, and enough sleep. Aging doesn’t have to stop us from staying active, rather it’s an opportunity to explore other physical activities that work for our bodies. By taking care of ourselves, we can stay healthy and vibrant while aging gracefully.
Thankfully, for most women, we realize that our body deserves to be treated with kindness and consistency. If you are a woman over 50, you know that sugar, alcohol, and other addictive substances will decrease your sense of physical well-being. Add in the reality that your hormones are surging and crashing like a California coastline, you learn to respect and support your aging body!
#8 You begin to forgive your parents.
Oh, this one is so important and can be so difficult! Yes, we are the result of our parents’ actions, starting with their choice to create us and bring us into this world. Knowing that each one of us has been impacted by childhood messages and family behaviors, we arrive in adulthood, imperfect, flawed, and now, responsible for our own personal growth and healing.
Life is not fair, but it has a way of equalizing its harshness. Each person has their own imperfections to confront and address.
There Is No Such Thing As A Perfect Parent
By the time a woman reaches 50, she has developed a sense of compassion for her parents. Despite the injuries and wounds, she has endured in their caregiving, she realizes that they were also imperfect people.
Most women after the age of 50 have begun to forgive their parent’s mistakes. Forgiveness does not take away the pain of the wound, but it is critical to move forward with your own self-growth. The more life experience we have, the greater our realization that all people are flawed. And most of them are truly doing the very best they know how to do.
Forgiving your parents is one of the most important steps in personal growth.
#9 You start to have compassion on your younger self
Much like the forgiveness we offer our parents, women over the age of 50 begin to practice self-compassion. We have lived long enough to know our own flaws and have navigated the consequences of our impulsive youthful choices.
My grandma used to say” You can’t put an old head on a new body.” She was right. We must be able to look in the mirror, see the years etched on our faces and extend compassion to our younger selves. She was doing the best she knew how, in a world that tempts us, tricks us, and ultimately bruises and batters each one of us.
Choosing self-compassion empowers us to move forward with greater levels of energy and joy. Letting go of our past mistakes and intentionally loving ourselves helps us improve our relationships. When we practice self–forgiveness, we can create a softer, more loving world for ourselves and those around us.
A positive mindset is essential to embracing aging and pursuing self-growth. We must focus on the positives, cherish our achievements, and look forward to new experiences. A positive mindset inspires us to keep going, even when faced with challenges!
Negative thoughts weigh us down and make us feel stuck. Midlife women need to focus on developing a positive mindset that celebrates our age, looks forward to the future, and encourages self-growth.
The Best Thing About Being Over 50
#10 You realize that everyone is just doing the best they can.
It’s really that simple. We are all doing the best we can.
Some of us are committed to the journey of self-growth, with a special focus on how our behavior impacts our relationships and our inner world.
And others of us don’t feel safe enough to take a serious look at how our behavior contributes to the world.
Both types of people live in this world, and both are making choices that will affect themselves and the generations to come.
When You Choose To Do The Best You Can
And by the time a woman turns 50, she can see that her” best” is different than what others might choose. Letting go of judgment (for self and others) and practicing forgiveness are the best ways to accept the complexity of this world.
We get to choose who we spend our time with, but practicing gentle acceptance of the world around us can lift so many invisible burdens.
Turning 50 Is Great!
Aging may be a fact of life, but it doesn’t have to be a burden or boring. By focusing on self-growth, accepting life realities, taking care of our bodies, fostering healthy relationships, and developing a positive mindset, we can embrace aging with grace and positivity.
Every woman is unique, and your journey toward embracing aging will be different. Remember, it’s never too late to focus on self-growth and live life to the fullest.
Finally, many women in middle age look for personal change because they want to make a difference in the world. As they enter this stage of life, many women begin to reassess their priorities and focus on making a positive impact on the world around them.
Tell Me What YOU Think Women Over The Age Of 50 Need To Know!
What is missing from this list? What would you add if you wrote it? Send me an email and tell me what you think needs to be number eleven. Or leave me a comment below with your idea for this list!
Some Final Thoughts
What happens when a woman turns 50? She accepts that she is a flawed but worthy human being. She realizes that most people in her life are really trying to be good humans. A woman in her 50s values herself enough to stop taking abuse and disrespect from those around her. She supports her aging body with healthy choices and says goodbye to the energy vampires in her life.
A woman in her 50s begins to understand and accept the power of love, for herself and those in her world.
Melane Ann is a writer, blogger, and life coach. In 2020, she turned her experience in midlife divorce and creating a new life for herself into midlifeismagical. With a master's in Marriage and Family Therapy, Melane focuses on helping women over 50 navigate their relationships and commit to healthy aging. She and her new husband share 7 children between them. Melane jokes that she has a black belt in blended families! In addition to her writing, Melane works virtually with her coaching clients from her home office.